Wait... Who are you again?

Hey! Hey you! Yeah, you. Look at me. Look over here. Hey. Hey hey hey hey look here. Are you looking? Do I have your full, undivided attention? Good.


Yes, the excessive greeting was completely necessary, as my slacking has reached it's prime and I have gone an entire 13 months without stepping foot in this corner of cyberspace! My apologies, lovelies.

I have a new layout and new digs, and a renewed resolve to start blogging again! So bear with me while I wipe the grime and rust from my keyboard and the space in my brain that keeps the blogging knowledge. But where to start, dear readers? There's so much new! Oh, you want to know about my penchant for breaking things that I like a lot? Well, I suppose I could oblige. Anything for the audience. :)

I'm the type of person who doesn't love easily. Unless it comes to objects. In which case, if I find something I like, I'm prone to loving it to the bitter end. My ways of showing affection, however, are quite unconventional, to say the least. In short: if I like something, I beat the shit out of it. Boots barely last two months before the soles are worn out and I've torn through the tops of them from all the activity (my career as a professional ass-kicker requires that I kick... lots of ass...) that I engage in. Jewelry tends to break at the most inconvenient times, scattering beads and string all over the lovely customers in the grocery store where I'm paid to entertain the masses and take their money in exchange for over-priced goods. And I even beat the shit out of kiss my lovely boyfriend too much to show my affection.

But today, dear friends, I was plunged into the dark ages as a direct result of my over-love. Mind you, I know how I treat material objects, so as a rule, I can't have nice things. But I fell in love with a little Palm Pixi in August and had to have it for my own. While it's no I-phone, the Pixi is no joke. This phone does everything I could ever want, and it's worth a nice little chunk of change. So I made an amendment to the rule (and, since I had smashed the screen of my previous phone in my car door on accident, I really needed a replacement). Seven months, so far, so good, right? Wrong! I can't have fully-functional, expensive, pretty possessions! This morning, I loved a little too hard on my phone as I was angrily shutting up tenderly caressing it to turn off the alarm and knocked it off my nightstand where it resides, and as it fell a grand total of two feet, something amazing happened. The screen broke... from the inside. This feat could only be accomplished by my hand, I swear it. As a highly advanced piece of technology, of course this phone cannot operate without the touch-screen. So, alas, I had achieved a disconnect and could hear texts and phone calls trying to reach me, but could not obtain the content of such communication.

I will not have another chance to reconnect with the cellular world until tomorrow, and this lack of texting/stupid-game playing/setting myself reminders and schedules electronically has taught me something. Not that I'm too dependent on my phone, no. Nor is it that I should unplug more often to get back to a natural way of living. On the contrary, it has taught me that I need my little Palm Pixi fix, much like a crack addict. So, as I count down the seconds until I'm reunited with my lovely, I may perhaps learn morse code as a means of communication. Or maybe pigeon mail would be better suited for me. If you hear the loud thud of bird-on-glass at your house, most likely at an ungodly hour of the night, know that my efforts have succeeded, and I'm trying to connect with you! So feed the pigeon and send me words of hope and inspiration to get me through this hard time, wouldja?



-Sass.

Greetings from No-Man's Land!

I apologize, dear friends, but I have been horribly remiss in my resolution to pick up blogging again. Exams, then vacationing in Dinosaur heaven (aka, the love of my life for being so freakin' cool, Pittsburgh), then starting up another semester all thwarted my plans of building momentum with this. It's a process, anyway.

However, to my small band of followers, I think having a nice (FUNCTIONAL) layout would help me get the ball rolling. Any suggestions? Every one I've found has been moot.


Until motivation returns to me,
-Sass.

Searching

We meet again, blogging world. It has been four long years since I have caused ruckus in this particular corner of cyberspace, and my blogging skills are rusty--I know this to be true because I rewrote this initial entry several times to censor my rambling nature. Naturally, I decided to botch my revisions and start from scratch, keeping my words as short and to-the-point as possible.

I've been inspired to return to blogging not only by witnessing my aunt's blogging success, but also by the fact that I fizzled out on my previous blog, which was, to say the least, received well for all the wrong reasons. In short, I had fooled my readers with large words phrased awkwardly to make them believe that I was poetic and worldly. I gave up the rose-coloured spectacles and haven't done anything in way of recreational writing since.

I'm here to resolve that. In a quest to find my niche in the blogging world, I decided to kill several birds with one stone (one of my many talents) and marry one neglected art with other neglected arts--painting, sewing, makeup, theatre... I do it all. Or, rather, I sometimes do it all. Most of the time I say I'll get around to the other things while I'm busy actively pursuing my theatrical dreams.

Rambling (again!) aside, my blogging niche will be about my inspirations, my projects, and my attempts at carving out a little time in the manic schedule I have to incorporate things that keep me sane. Complete with witty repartee, cynical remarks I may have about the state of the world as I view it at any given time, and the colour that makes up my life, all for the low, low price of... That's right, ladies and gents, just a few minutes of your time! And might I say that I know how expensive time can be, so I appreciate all donations.

So, hello to all, I go by an evolved nickname/alias "Sass", and yes, the name is indicative of certain aspects of my character. It's good to be back.